Saturday, May 24, 2008

Back, and (kind of) liveblogging Game One!

7:15p According to the Detroit Arena announcer, it is time for a ceremonial face-off with the captains, Nick Lidstrom and Steven Crosby.

STEVEN?! How do you get an arena job if you have apparently never before been exposed to the NHL?

7:19p I miss Georges!

7:35p In terms of playoff beards, Detroit is clearly way ahead. In terms of play, pleasingly matched so far. That Steven guy hasn't done anything amazing yet, but I retain high hopes. I'm also pleased that two such intense hockey towns got to the final--the shot of Pittsburgh fans filling their arena to watch on TV says we have some deserving fans this year.

7:49p Terrible call against Detroit--waving off that goal. If Holmstrom interfered with Fleury, I have too several times already this evening. I'm kinda slightly rooting for Pittsburgh, but I'd hate to see a call like this impact a game.

8:00p I highly approve the giant inflatable octopus in the rafters of Joe Louis Arena. At the end of the first period, I'm very excited overall about the series. This should be an excellent matchup over however many games, and I'm quite happy to give my holiday weekend over to the first two games.

I base my excitement/quality meter of a game on how much danger is posed to my rug by the beverage in my hand. There's been a lot of flailing with the wineglass this evening so far, and I blame it on how well both teams are focused on neutralizing the threats from the opposing bench. I've never seen it executed so consistently before and it truly pleases me.

8:05p Messier still doesn't know how to look into the camera when he speaks. it's endearing.

8:36p Bee-you-ti-ful goal Detroit! Best way to counter a lame call against. Good thing I'm drinking white and not red wine.

8:41p The Vs. announcers may have given away something key about themselves, describing Samuelsson's visiting father and brother from Sweden as "a couple of happy humans." Oh, those hue-mons. It is hard to predict what will make them happy.

8:46p D has observed astutely that Fleury is fighting hard to keep his team in this. I love young crazy goalies.

8:55p After two periods, though I have not kept entirely accurate count, I think I can estimate having seen approximately 400 ads for WEC Ultimate Cage Fighting. I'm your target demographic for that, Vs. Network? Really?

The Swedish players speak English in interviews with much better accents than I do. Then again, I do have the disadvantage of having been born in Boston.

9:05p Whoa... ad for what looks like a terrible new Mike Myers film that appears to be hockey-themed and featuring a pile of Daily Show correspondents and alums. Pity.

9:20p Crosby looks frustrated on the bench, like he expected things to be hard but not this hard. Detroit is playing tight sharp hockey, and not to flog the lamest of cliches, but the fans are the biggest winners tonight.

9:46p Well, this one is over. I admire and fear the Redwings. It's okay, Steve--Sid. There's always Monday.

Meanwhile, I have always enjoyed the silliness that is closed-captioning of hockey announcers when watching the game in bars (BP for example), since it's always garbled into some language even more fantastical than the usual nonsense the announcers spew. That said, these announcers tonight (suspiciously wowed by humans as they are) are one-upping things by speaking like closed-captioning.

"The Redwings don't want to allow him to guy to carry the puck to make plays"

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you your new robot hockey announcers.

Monday, May 5, 2008


This kind of fandom? Crossing waaaaaaaaay over into the bad kind of crazy.

NASHUA, N.H. (AP) -- A woman accused of running down a man in her car after a Red Sox-Yankees argument in a bar never hit her brakes as she accelerated toward the small group he was in, a prosecutor said Monday.

"She never braked, and she accelerated at a high speed for about 200 feet. She went directly at this group of people," prosecutor Susan Morrell said of Ivonne Hernandez, who is charged with reckless second-degree murder in the death early Friday of Matthew Beaudoin, 29.

MarriedtotheOil has been on hiatus, due to pressing work and dental concerns. We hope to return to posting at least once a week throughout the offseason by next week. In the meantime, Go Pens. Crosby.