Tuesday, January 29, 2008

The Vs. announcers are apparently in a drought

Argh, argh, triple argh. (expanded from earlier posts today)


I am not one of those fans who is automatically baying for blood whenever my team loses, but dude, we suck these days and it is depressing and terrible to watch and I am finally losing patience. I'm watching Canucks vs. Dallas right now to try and get the nasty taste out of my mouth. Was Horcoff saved from the zombies that came through and bit the whole roster by being out of town last weekend? Because he, Moreau, and intermittantly Pisani and Hemsky, were the only players who looked literally alive out there tonight.

Only compounding matters was the disturbing commentary by the Vs. team, featuring such quotes as "there are two bulls rutting at center ice" and "a buxom rebound off the pillows." I have to say, "buxom rebound" is not a phrase I ever want to hear again.

Moving on, the NHL is pushing its new promos online. Besides the expected array of Crosbiliciousness, and the requisite OMG the NHL has discovered the interwebs spots, there's this spot, which is clearly not new and which seems a little... weird... to me. Am I alone in this belief?



Let's review. Gretzky, Lemieux, and Howe appear to be terminally depressed robots who can open rifts in the space-time continuum to witness their past glories (well, the past glories of the humans they are replicating). The "current" players are straight out of some sort of awful horror movie framing, and I have to restrain the urge to shout "Run Robot Wayne, run!" when they start banging their sticks on the ice, because it is clear they are circling in for the kill. I'm surprised the NHL is feauturing such a shockingly Crosby-free promo on the site, (as their world is measured in B.C (Before Crosby) and the present era.) and also I think it may give me nightmares tonight, as if if tonight's game wouldn't have already.

(I swear the promised Falcons stuff is coming, I've just had a busy start to the week.)

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